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Fit the Twenty-Eighth
Fit the Twenty-Eighth is the twenty-eighth episode or 'fit' in the radio series, and the second in the ''Hexagonal Phase''. Plot summary The Earth is in the process of being destroyed, but all the major characters are on the Heart of Gold and, for the moment, safe. They realise that the Grebulons' death beams are closing in on them, and the ship's Dodge-O-Matic system has overloaded. Most of the characters are panicking but Ford, still under the influence of his marsh-worm cigar, is unbearably positive about the situation. Zaphod reveals what has happened to his second head - he had it removed and hooked up to the ship's control panel, essentially becoming part of the computer. He introduces them to LB - Left Brain, and claims he is called this because he was on the left and the brainy one. Upon being asked why he had LB removed, he starts to say something, but is interrupted by Left Brain, who insists it was a teleportation accident. As music starts, Zaphod realises that it is the Heart of Gold karaoke night, and LB sings The Teleportation Blues song. He then starts to work out how start up the Infinite Improbability Drive, but Ford interrupts him and points out that Zaphod turning up to rescue his favourite cousin in the Heart of Gold from certain death seems like a pattern, and patterns aren't a good basis for improbability. Left Brain thinks this over, and goes into a loop. Bowerick Wowbagger arrives, and Trillian lets him aboard the ship. He insults Zaphod, calling him "steatopygic", and Zaphod swears to have him killed. At the same time, the others realise that as Wowbagger's ship is powered by dark energy, he can save them. Despite, or perhaps because of Zaphod, Wowbagger lets them aboard his ship. He explains that he is sick of being immortal, and wants to die. Below them the Earth is finally destroyed. There is a short Guide note, stating that this Arthur Dent is now the only one left in any universe, all others having died at some point along the line. It then goes on to say how repulsive Vogons are. Constant Mown, a Vogon, tells Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz, who happens to be his father, that their ship, The Business End is ready for hyperspace, and also about the colony of Earthlings who have moved to the planet Nano. Jeltz announces that they must destroy these Earthlings too, or they have not finished the job. Mown feels bad about himself. Hillman Hunter, the leader of the colony on Nano, is interviewing deities to try and find a god to rule of their planet. He interviews Cthulu, but rejects him on the grounds that he is in fact a demi-god rather than a god, and thus able to die - his current state is "dead but dreaming." Arthur is woken up by the Tanngrisnir's computer - which looks exactly like Fenchurch. He talks to the computer for a while, half thinking that she is Fenchurch even when he knows she's not, before going down to the bridge, where Wowbagger sends Zaphod to Asgard to find Thor to kill him. Wowbagger and Random do not get on. Cast and Characters * The Book - John Lloyd * Arthur Dent - Simon Jones * Ford Prefect - Geoffrey McGivern * Trillian - Sandra Dickinson * Zaphod Beeblebrox - Mark Wing-Davey * Left Brain - Mitch Benn * Random Dent - Sam Béart * Bowerick Wowbagger and Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz - Toby Longworth * Constant Mown - Andrew Secombe * Hillman Hunter - Ed Byrne * Cthulu - Jon Culshaw * Fenchurch (The Tanngrisnir computer) - Jane Horrocks * The Heart of Gold doors - Philip Pope * Announcer - John Marsh Fit 34 Fit 2